In 2020 It's Time To Break Up With Your Fake Friends
A new year, a new beginning. Time for some cleaning up in your life...
There may be too many people we call 'friends'.
Just because you hang out together, meet regularly and have common hobbies or friends, it doesn't mean your friendship is true. We are often too quick to call somebody 'our friend', then get our hearts broken when we realize they're actually not. It's nearly impossible to have 10 or more true friends, so if you've got more than a few, you may want to take a closer look at the list. You could be very lucky, but you may also be dealing with some fake friends.
Some people pretend to be your friends for a reason.
If only one of you benefits from your friendship and it isn't you, they're not your real friend. People do this for so many reasons, it makes you question their sanity. Some need not friends, but fans. Some will act as your friends for material benefits. Some will act like your BFF when they secretly want to sleep with your husband. Some will do it out of envy. Others need people to do them favors, give them free rides or help with commissions. And some will do it to steal your job.
It's not that easy to spot a fake friend.
While a true friend will tell you straight up that you look awful in your new dress, a fake one will kiss your ass, especially in the beginning. They spoil you with compliments and small gifts, to win your heart. If you're not a skeptical person, you will easily fall for them and their game of manipulation.
How do you spot a fake friend?
If there's the tiniest seed of doubt in your mind, you've probably spotted them already. You've heard rumors that they've been talking behind your back, you've seen them manipulating others, or you've noticed how their attitude changes in some situations.
Here are a few signs of a fake friend:
1. They often say things like "If you're a true friend, then..."
2. They act completely different when it's just the two of you, then when you're among other people.
3. They've been talking poorly about you behind your back.
4. They always need something from you.
5. And when you can't deliver, they just stop talking to you.
6. Whenever someone more interesting shows up, they disappear.
7. They don't seem to have your best interests at heart.
8. They never seem to listen to what you're saying.
9. All your conversations are around them and their interests.
10. Somehow, they only show up when they need a favor.
Ask yourself this: What if I stopped driving my friend to the mall for free every week? What if I stopped paying for drinks when we go out? What if I lose my social status? Would he or she still be my friend?
Nobody's life is all milk and honey, so don't you worry: at the first obstacle you encounter, you'll see them running. Fake friends don't stick around when YOU need them. However, if you want to test one of your friends, ask them for a favor they've asked you before. If they stop answering your calls, you'll know why.
How to get rid of fake friends?
It's really not that hard, because fake people will disappear from your life once they lose the benefits. Once you stop pleasing them, they'll leave on their own.
How to protect yourself from fake people?
Choose your friends wisely, by their quality, not by their social status, financial power, or social circle. If a person is kind, they'll be kind to everyone, not just you. Surround yourself with good people.
Keep your friend list short. You don't need 100 friends, but a few, true ones. Popularity is only fun in high school.
Be kind and generous, but learn to say NO. Help your friends, but when the favors they ask become too much, too often, learn to say NO. If you lose them over this, they were never your friends.
Take a good look at how your friends treat others. Are they rude to others? Do they talk poorly about their other friends? They could be treating you the same way in the future.